I want you to take a moment to pause and think about why you want to invest in your marriage. What is your purpose? Is it merely to avoid divorce? Or do you desire something much greater?
Have you ever considered that marriage is not for your own happiness or comfort? I know, difficult to think of in such a way isn't it? But let's dig deeper and try to understand God's purpose for a wife. We know we were created to be helpers for our husband's, but what exactly does that mean? Are we simply to cook and clean for them? Give them intimacy when they need it?
Those may be the basics of marriage, but still, it goes deeper. Our marriage is a picture of our relationship with Christ. How we relate to our husbands, how we honor them and submit to them, paints a picture of how we relate to Christ, honor Him and submit to Him.
Our marriage represents more than happiness on earth; it represents relationship with Christ. It's a covenant that goes far beyond relational. It's a picture of permanence. It's not even about staying in love.
It is not your love that sustains the marriage, but from now on, the marriage that sustains your love. -Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Letters and Papers from Prison, 27-28
Marriage is a covenant. A promise of commitment, not to your own happiness, but to your husband as his helper. The joy of marriage overflows from the investment and sacrifice. It's not something that just happens or comes easily. It requires intentionality.
It's important for us to come back to the reason marriage was created in the first place--this will help us define our purpose as a wife. When we know what our purpose is, we will better know how to fulfill our role in our marriage, thus creating a beautiful picture of covenant-keeping grace.
We don't love our husbands because they deserve it or have earned it. Likewise, we shouldn't withhold love from our husbands because we think they don't deserve it or because they haven't earned it from us.
If Christ worked like that in our lives, we'd all be in trouble.
So as we read and prepare for The Husband Project, take care not to hold back your best.
Be mindful of your motives and give without thought of getting in return. As hard as it is, we need to think outside ourselves and even our own needs. If we're doing this only to have our needs met as a turn around, we might find ourselves disappointed and deem The Husband Project a failure.
That's not what The Husband Project is for. It is meant for our husbands and them alone. Can we do it? Can we sacrifice 21 days (and beyond) of thinking only of our husbands and how we want to bless them?
I believe we can!! There are over 200 women signed up to take on The Husband Project - we are not alone!
So this week, your homework is to read the book. We'll have two weeks to get through the entire book. Feel free to highlight, make notes in the margins, and do whatever you need to do to make the most of this challenge.
What challenges do you anticipate you'll face throughout this project?
Still need to buy the book? There's still time!! Buy it here.