Five years ago we moved from a two bedroom home (with no garage or basement), to a 3-bedroom home with a garage and basement. Bedrooms are bigger and living space is a bit bigger. I was pregnant with number four when we moved. Our purpose was solely space. We needed more of it.
When we moved into the house we're in now, we were content to grow old here. We had our fifth baby here and still live quite comfortably. But then God planted something we didn't expect in this season of our lives. And that seed continues to grow in our hearts and will begin its fruition soon.
As our family grows, naturally we will need more space. In America, we have pretty high standards set up by the government and social welfare as to what is acceptable living space for families of different sizes.
Personally, I think we could get away with living in smaller spaces with more children. But, the calling God has put on our lives is to bring orphans into our home and love them. He's not too small to provide for what we need and what's required by American regulations.
So this girl started to dream.
For someone who is so careful about wanting "bigger and better", I am actually seeking something spacious, but humble. I have grown very fond of dented and scuffed, well used things. And less things. I really do long for a more simple life.
So, I'm dreaming of a farmhouse - with a few acres.
With old cabinets and wooden floors that just beg to get mud on them.
I see our seven (or more!) children running and playing together in the wide open space. I see God's purpose unfolding, even today, as we live in our day to day.
Sometimes God's purposes are simple, and sometimes they are intricate. I find the need for a larger house so we can love on more children as a very simple part of God's purpose.
I often wonder if God really cares about such trite things. Or does He frown upon us for putting our energies into such things? It's a difficult thing to understand. The Bible talks about not getting caught up with the things of this world, and though we have to live here for a while, does God want us to concern ourselves with home decor?
But then, I know He has also created us to be creative and to make a home a haven. And quite honestly, this world is a hard and evil place to live. It really is. Our lives could definitely use some beauty in it so the darkness doesn't become so heavy. Not a necessity, but definitely a perk, I think.
You can see how torn I am about this dreaming stuff. The Bible cautions about chasing after the things of this world. The answer seems so cloudy to me still. I want to use my home to bless others, not just to live in, I suppose.
After all, isn't dreaming about serving others?